January 2009
mini chicago vacation starts
now.
later boners.
have you ever seen the host Diners Drive in's and...
HE FUCKING SUCKS!
On the other hand Tyler from Tyler’s Ultimate is a husky hottie. Seriously.
Any food network lovers?
A Dram of Poison - I roofied my wife to save our... →
Finally she proposes something new, something we had both sort of anticipated, for at this point in the game we are not really going to fool each other. But this time it will be only semi-fantasy: my wife will really be at the bar pretending not to know me, and I really will slip something nefarious into her drink.
two good things about my facebook news feed @ 4am
1. the old GA for the radio station didn’t shave for seven years, has never been in a serious relationship, and would rather be playing her guitar!
2. EJ’s girlfriend has been cheating on her for their entire relationship! OH NOOO!
How the fuck did I end up with ONE Tylenol PM.
OR I need to graduate to Ambien
If Dating Were Like Business
rkb:patriciahandschiegel:
I’m not sure how it is for other women entrepreneurs but dating for me and most of my friends who own start-ups is usually tough. It got me thinking. What if dating were handled more like a business deal? Tonight, because I am so overworked I can’t sleep, and so overtired I feel slap happy, here is what dating would look like if it were based on how I handle most of my...
It wasn’t a snow day but since my car was snowed in till about 4pm it was a snow day for me.
my internal monologue while looking for jobs.
I have a six years of retail experience and I have a degree in fashion merchandising. I need a job. I’m also spent two years in a manager in training program. I’m awesome. Hire me. I work hard. hire me. I work really hard. I’m dedicated. I’ll spend money at this company like my vag is on fire. I’m awesome.
ideas? laureniswhatweaimfor at yahoo dot com.
I’m wearing Julie’s Uggs and they are the most comfortable things i’ve ever put on my feet.
I feel so ashamed. So dirty.
I’m also wearing men’s long johns and a flannel shirt. I’m not going anywhere today but that’s beside the point.
These are on my feet and I want to own them.
Love when I hear stupid complaints and I visualize “white whine” in all caps.
Snow days are the best days.
thigh high stockings + speed skater thighs.
NOT A GOOD LOOK.
- A friendly reminder.
oh it's New Jack Swing Tuesday.
you’re welcome.
Once me and the boyf (pre relationship) had an argument about the word Tenderoni. It was stupid. but looking back I would like to tell the world I WAS RIGHT.
HOW DARE YOU SAY CHROMEO CAME UP WITH THAT?
YO, I’LL KILL YOU IN THE NAME OF NEW JACK SWING.
so I’ve know about school being closed since about 4am and this bitch has known about it since 11pm?
you’re dead to me.
p.s. catchphrase later? Cool.
snow day plans
1. homework 2. cleaning 3. catchphrase. 4. afternoon drinking.
SNOW DAY.
"Looookin' good!" Monica states while looking out...
(via babybitch)
things I found while looking for my phone 1. bag of water, maybe it was ice? 2. a check 3. glasses
things I did not find 1. phone.
smart balls are a sex toy fail.
They’re kinda like family game night when you play who’s who of black history. The whole time wondering “where’s the fucking UNO?!”
julie911:
Blood Bank - Bon Iver Then the snow...
How is she in a relationship? She fucking sucks.
Undeserving of love? My problem was quite the opposite.
you’re my discovered pot of gold.
the saturday night solution
thermals + book + Tylenol pm
I should shower, I should get dressed, I should stop playing “she got her own” on repeat, I should start to properly get drunk enough to go to the bars
but it’s 15 degrees y’all. 15 mother fuckin degrees. enough said.
WatchSHAMELESS SHIT PART 2
BEST PURCHASE OF THE WEEK
“it never rains in southern california”
NO. SERIOUSLY.
one
I’ll stop acting like a twat and start to be appreciative of my shitty job because that shitty job pays my meager bills and allows me to buy stupid shit like used books, awesome scarves, thrift store blazers, train tickets, gas, sex toys, and alcohol.
hooray for all of the above.
vanityfactory:
i just bought a copy of prep from the thrift store and was only about three pages into it when i discovered that the previous owner had taken the time to cross out every curse word with a blue pen and a heavy hand. this continues all the way to the end of the book. i guess i’ll have to use CONTEXT to decipher whether curtis sittenfeld wanted to use (a) shit, (b) damn, or (c) fuck....
BUYING SINGLES ON ITUNES IS A DOWNHILL SLOPE.
20 mins ago I really needed to HAVE Montell Jordan “get it on tonite”. Now, not so much.
britticisms:
via caleparks and witchhunt:
“Oh...
stevienickshasnever:
Whitney Houston has never ran into a Starbucks, grabbed a fist full of straws and bolted out the door.
